Ribcage

Badump! Badump! Badump!

A little red bird screams its silent song.
Someone once took great care in sheltering it from the outside world,
Building a cage of bone, and twine, and gold,
Quite austere, but wonderful for a stranger to behold,

Yet the bird shrieks all day long,
Pressing its neck through gilded bars, so far as to dig into its flesh;
There's food for ages, but you can see its ribs through its chest.

It hasn't thought of resting its hoarse voice,
Of accepting its prison temporarily, as if it had a choice,
And letting its wounds heal, gathering up strength,
To then wreck its odious home with a thousand pecks.

A walk

Today, I decided to take advantage of my university's geographical location and i headed to the beach after class this morning. When I reached the sand, I took off my shoes and socks, and felt the grains between my toes, not really silky smooth but with little rocks and imperfections. So I walked diagonally to the seashore, and proceeded to stroll between the raging waves and the wall of sand that had been created by erosion recently, because it hadn't been there in the summer; maybe it's a seasonal thing.
The sights were perfect. On one side, the city, on the other, waves so big they could engulf you if you dove in. The water was white and turbulent, frothing with foam, and the wind pulled my shoelaces and hair to the side, but I just let it sway... One of my baggy sweater's sleeves hung low, past my dangling hand, and the other was pulled up, as I held my notebooks and ipod, which connected back to my head. The music and sound of beach waves created the perfect high, and the water caressed my toes. I stopped to roll up my pant legs, to get in a little deeper, and now it felt like I was in the water with the big waves.
I followed the shoreline until I got to the moors, which are made of big rocks with asphalt and gravel on top; I jumped the fence and walked down one, as painful as stepping on pebbles is barefoot. On my side, a man had caught a huge fish, he screamed at a partner in another moor, then smiled and said hello. I went to the edge, standing as far as I could. Looking down, the rocks on the edge look like dice that have been tossed mercilessly by a cruel god. If you stare into the horizon, it's like looking into every single of the places you've lived... In my case, I imagined the beaches of Latakya in Syria, and the fishing club in Buenos Aires that my brother once was a part of. Even if the places aren't really in the direction you're staring at, looking into the sea feels like you're looking straight at your origins. Columbus is pointing that way, though, into the Mediterranean. I wonder why that is.
The waves crashed upon the dice and occasionally a light spray of saltwater would land on my face and body. It was rhythmical. The sea is so soothing, even when it's rough. In the sky, clouds danced this way and that, but the sun kept on shining. I made my way into the city, only looking back to put on my sneakers and take off my sweater.

Si quieres un amigo, ¡Domestícame!
- ¿Qué hay que hacer? -- dijo el principito.
-- Hay que ser paciente-- respondio el zorro--. Te sentarás al principio un poco lejos de mí, así, en la hierba. Te miraré de reojo y no dirás nada. La palabra es fuente de malentendidos. Pero cada dia, podrás sentarte un poquito más cerca...

Baby, it's a Wild World

aburrido

As I walk, I count the steps I take,
I listen to the sounds they make
On the pavement of the street
Step one, Step two, say my two feet,

And I like to look back,
Think of all the things I used to do
The days I walked the city through,

But one thing that I have found
Is that no matter how lovely the sound
Of long-gone paces on the street,
(Step one, Step two, that lively beat)

When you stop to listen, it's done,
And memories won't take you back,
'Cause time walks on a one-way track...

Caminaba por la orilla del mar, un atardecer,
Y sentí la brisa marina disolviendome la piel.
La mudé y la mudé, y en nada me quedé...

Sunset, Sunrise

On a dimming, dull afternoon, the sun
Makes its way through tall, grey-green trees,
Setting slow and soft, with no rush;
Night then soaks through the atmosphere,

And the world becomes black, silver and blue
of unlit earth, mother moon, and the stars;
The crickets chirp for hours on end,
Until the moon starts to descend,

And amidst the buzzing hubbub of bees,
Of flittering flies and low circling leaves,
Long yellow rays of travelling light
Shoot down the dark with fearless might,

Through drops of dew lying on resting plants,
Waking ripples of water in a pond,
And setting a black sky ablaze
'To violet, red and orange haze.


I've spent the previous hour or so writing this, to destress and avoid thinking that tomorrow I start college. I'm so nervous, and definitely starting off on the wrong foot, because I forgot to attend the first two classes of catalan (come on, they were before classes officially start, they caught me by surprise/ I would not have attended the first one had I known, because I had a big exam) and very possibly this could mean that I no longer have a spot reserved in said class.
This in turn means that, since at least half my classes are in catalan, and I do not speak it well (or at all, for that matter, I just sort of understand it), I could find myself completely lost for the first trimester or so.
I'm hoping I can sort this out tomorrow and attend catalan that very afternoon.
Also, I'm really excited for starting, but scared shitless at the same time. My reasons are:
1- CATALAN
2- Well, that is it. There's also the fact that I'm going to be lost in a sea of people who do not know my name, and will be forced to step out of my shell and start talking to strangers so I can make friends. But I will have friends in time, and I'm hoping that, since everyone's in the same situation, they'll talk to me first, haha.
I'm really looking forward to meeting new people of different backgrounds. Also, the campus is by the beach, which is such an amazing thing. Smoking is prohibited, which I find strange because all the other unis have the teachers smoking with the students. However, I don't mind it at all, though the first thing you stumbled upon when entering the UPF site was this big scary sign warning you about smoking on uni turf.
It's strange, everybody else has already started, and I'm the last to go. Just give me my blindfold and a cigarette, and set me against the wall already. Haha. But I'm as ready as I'll ever be.
It's taken me a long time to actually think about this but there are aspects of school I will miss.
Well, first of all, I finally have to face I'm not a kid anymore (yep, I realised I'm an adult a year too late), and that I'm getting old and withering and soon I shall die. Hahha well, I do want to grow old. And you can die anytime, anywhere, it's all just a matter of chance.
Then there's the speaking in English. I'll miss just chatting in English with whoever in the hallways-- now it's only Catalan, and Spanish if I'm lucky. Plus, walking around the city with English-speaking friends made me feel really cool / slightly douchey at times haha. But being able to pull out the cellphone and call some foreigner to impress a pretty girl on the metro was a great ace up my sleeve. I guess I can still get away with this, on occasions.

Ah, another scary thought that lurks in the depths of my mind is this one: if, by a stroke of luck, I get invited out this weekend (it's a catalan holiday, we have friday off and everybody goes out all night that night), I have to decline, because I'll be in Madrid. This means a prossible loss of said friendship, because I'll look like someone who tends not to accept proposals to go out (which might sort of be true haha) which means that any friendships I make this week will be null and void next week, which then means that I will have to omit this week from friendship-building and will have to start, from scratch, next week.
Though I doubt I'll have friends for some time. I hope I meet someone magical, with whom I just click, and everything is energetic and electric. Like in On the Road.
Had not had one of these rants in a long time. Feels strange to write in English (but I guess it is good practice, since I won't be doing so in class anymore), but it feels good to say anything I want on this page. I'm like a girl with a diary, ha. (or, like Don Draper with a diary, ha haa.)
I hope all goes well tomorrow. If it doesn't, I at least hope it's a big, whacky, embarassing anecdote that I can laugh at this upcoming afternoon.
Oh, and I hope catalan classes work out... (I pray)